Me, Myself, and I

İçimdeki Çocuk

2012-01-30T02:39:00.000+02:00

Selam

   Canım çekti Türkçe yazmak.
   Yarın için pek bir heyecanlı olduğum için dayanamadım yazıyorum. Çünkü yeni bir staja başlıyorum. Elephant Style adlı bir luxery dergisinde. Anlatması açıklaması çok zor bir iş ama benim istediğim, hatta ilerde istediğimden bile fazlası diyebilirim. Her şey craiglistten tanıştığım Brittany'nin eşyalarını satın almamla başladı. Yarın da bakalım TOGY'de başlıyorum. Çok zamanım yok ama elimden gelenin en iyisini yapacağım umarım.
   Bir de bugün kendime İnci'den çizmeler aldım, çok beğendim. Çocuğum belki hala, ne zaman kendime yeni bir şeyler alsam, eve gelince yatıncaya kadar çıkarmıyorum onları. That's what happened today:) Eteğimi, yeni beremi bile çıkarmadığımı itiraf etsem beni ayıplamazsınız umarım. Herkesin tek başınayken yaptığı çocukluklar vardır herhalde. Benim de bu işte:) Ben itiraf edebiliyorum o kadar:)
   Bir de ne kadar şikayet edersem edeyim, evimde kendime vakit ayırabildiğim zaman, dünyanın en mutlu insanıyım...
Öperim.

Getting rid offfff....

2012-01-23T00:35:00.002+02:00

Hi

   As i was freaked out, i was right to be so, because, my dearest friend who became my 'boyfriend' later on attempted to hurt me deeeeeply. I was the last person he should have treated so. I was the only one who was with him all the time when he needs support. I was the one who was more than enough patient with him. Even i was surprised at the fact that i can be that patient and caring and nice. I never treated someone as nice as i did to him. I knew that it wouldnt work. I told him so, when he attempted to call, me talk to me this way, i told him clearly that let's be friends, the other way wont work for us, because we had experienced. But he didnt listened to me, he argued contrary, he said that he changed and he wants to be happy with me and make me 'happy'. I told him many times that i am great, i am doing great without him. But he said he wants to make me happier, with him, he treated me bad before because he was not well either but now he healed, and he wants us to be happy!
   A BIG LIE!!.!
   I was relying on hiö in one point. I thought that he would never lie to me, he was honest, always, i wanted so even though it hurt me too much from time to time. But here we are, a big, dishonest lie....
   Is it true that you should never be too nice to people! Is it better to be an asshole in order to do well in your life?
   I still dont know the answers. But i am very sorry about it. I never meant to come to en end like that. I tried to hurt him, or tell him the truths during our final conversation! May be i hurt him, but the stuff i told him was just the bare truths he should have seen!And it is very true that i am a very strong woman, so i dont suffer or i am not devestated! I AM STRONG! However because he is too weak, he will suffer! Before i did care of him, i did take care of him! But now, since he tried to hurt me that bad, i dont give a shit! It is his life and he will learn to be strong one day. He will remember of me one day, feeling sorry... He knows well from deep inside that i didnt deserve any of these...
   Thanks to his fault, i regained my self esteem! I am great. If he didnt notice it, may be because i was too modest, it is his fault. I feel great now and i know that i am great! The people who will try to get to know me will understand so. For those people, i will be more than nice. For the others who just judge me before getting to know, i dont give a shit. They lose.
   Yeah. That's me.I am very glad that i got my self esteem back! I did need it!
I have been living my life...
   H.

Time will show

2012-01-13T11:39:00.000+02:00

Hi
I just started something like a relationship; however literally i am freaking out that i will be sad. I hope i will never get upset by someone. We will see. If he tries to make me unhappy, contrary to what he promised to me, i will just go away...
That's me...
to run away...
until when? boh...
that's me.
H.

...

2011-12-21T09:12:00.000+02:00

Öylesine korkuyorum ki sevilmemekten, istenmemekten, yalnızlıkta buluyorum mutluluğu...
H.

I am looking for a way to run away...

2011-12-19T03:18:00.001+02:00

Hi,

   I think now everybody knows that I hate my life in İstanbul. Not because İstanbul is not cool. It is cool, my life is supposed to be cool; however, I am not the person to live that life which has many responsibilities. After six months of travelling, no way to live longer like that.
   Please think of my last 3 months here. I arrived to İstanbul and started the big chaos of classes. Then I had to apply for the job announcements. Because I was living in the dormitory temporarily because I didnt want to live in the dorm but to rent a flat. I didnt ask many people around me. I was thinking that I will just find a room in a flat where the other were already living. However, it didnt happen so; the life is such a desicion maker so we became flatmates with an ex-erasmus friend of me and her friend.
   In the beginning of October, I was going crazy like, going to job interviews, looking for a flat, going to classes, etc. I used to like a guy whom I met in Antalya and the destiny again decided not to allow us to know each other and one day after spending the whole day looking for a flat, getting wet under the rain, not eating anything, then going to my date in the evening...The result is a disaster or disappointment.
   Whatever, then we have found a nice flat, very nice area, close to everywhere. Guess what happened: We couldnt move in for a months because there were bueracratic obstacles such as WATER...
   Because there was not any water we couldnt clean the flat, we couldnt move in.It was tragic.I could hardly afford the rent and I couldnt live in my flat.Then We dealt with it and moved in. Then what happened? The smallest and shapeless room was mine after a lot among us. I was so sad but it is ok now:)
   Then what happened strange in my life was to be very close neighbours with a friend of me who was staying with his girlfriend there. By this way we had the chance to meet often. Then his girlfriend broke up with him and we spent nearly two weeks nearly altogether. We were too different as a person; however, I liked the serenity on him, and i guess I was very interesting and different for him. Now he moved to the other side and I dont think that nothing will be the same.
   I started tutoring four days at a week. I have been working one and a half day in a tourism office. One full day I spent at my tranee school. Three days at a week I have classes from 9 till 6.
   So, I was kind of losing my mind, however there were my crazy weekends. During the week, I barely found the time to breathe, then at the weekends, I was partying crazily.
   However now, I dont like partying either. I like the serenity in my room, dealing with stuff at my flat, reading travel books, or surfing on internet, watching tv or movies.
   I am totally different from past years. My problems are also totally different. I do have many friends this year I dont know how. I remember in the past years I was feeling lonely often. Now, I need to be lonely! To stay alone makes me happy. May be I am not lonely most of the time that's why I enjoy it.
   In those 3 months I have experienced a lot of both nice and unliked coincidences. Yes. I love coincidenced in general; however, I never thought that there could be also bad coincidences. Now I know.
   My life is going out of my control, literally.
   I hate the fact that I have to work to live in İstanbul, because I fucking like all luxury. I hate that feature of me. I eat expensive, I drink expensive, I wear expensive ( even though nowadays I even couldnt have time to shop).
  If I am staying in İstanbul, I demand free time to have an activity for me such as a dance course or theatre course. I'd love to do those!
   However, I want most to RUN AWAY!
   I am worried of myself actually, it seems to me one day will come and I will just decide to go away. Without knowing where, with which money, and without completing my university education. Please God, show the right way. Or else i have been drifting. I need to travel. I dont have enough money to go to Beirut however, I think i am going there. During the break. I need to travel.
  Ohh, I need the patience to live here one more semester. Or even more:( I need to run away at least next year even though the destination will still be Europe. However, I love Spain and the fact that I will learn Spanish make me very happy and optimistic. I need to find a way to go there!
I JUST NEED TO TRAVEL!
Look how happy I used to be:

My smile is not the same any more.
I am going to sleep 2-3 hours then I have to go to my trainee school.
Have a nice life world citizens.
Xoxo
H.

Drifting

2011-12-18T01:19:00.000+02:00

Ciao,

Wawww, 3 months in İstanbul and i am 3 years older now. But physically!
I grew up mentally 3 years during the last 8 months, during my Erasmus. However, here in İstanbul, you cannot develop yourself but the only thing you can do it to be older and older. Physically...
To get drunk on the other hand, the best thing you can do if you do have time for it....
H.

Neler Oluyor Hayatta

2011-12-07T11:16:00.001+02:00

Neler olmuyor ki şu hayatta sevgili gençler.
Evimize internetin gelmesiylen ve sınavlarımın bitmesinin ardından, kısa özetler sizleri bekliyor olacak:)
....
H.

I hate winters

2011-10-12T13:34:00.002+03:00

I hate winters. Not just because i hate the cold weather, but also i spend my worst days during the winter.

Added every single negative thing together, Hilal is being drafted to depression and getting lost. I hate the school, i hate working, i hate wearing furry stuff, i hate carrying an umbrella, i hate wearing boots, i hate the wind, i hate the bills, i hate to move on to a new apartment, i hate dealing with the people i hate, i hate the transportation in İstanbul, i hate the fact that i still do not have a car in İstanbul, i hate the boring stuff of applying for sth, i hate the people who hate me, i hate classical turkish guys, i hate the way they think of the turkish girls, i hate the irrosponsible fathers, families, i hate the people who have elder sisters or bothers, i hate to be the eldest one, i hate to be the only one in İstanbul form my friends and family, i hate my department, i hate FLED courses all of them, i hate going to Beykoz every Monday, i hate Philip Morris because they didnt accept me, i hate to be lazy but during winter i am too lazy......

This I hate phrases will never end, so; i am just keeping my fingers crossed in order the summer to come as soon as possible.

Or i should just RUN AWAY. If I can.

H.

How to get yourself ashamed of you

2011-10-01T15:43:00.003+03:00

Hi,

   At that very moment, i wanna be nothing, i want the ground to open and take me inside. Yesterday, i spend a day but it was not me! The person was just not me.
   I become drunk generally but the moments i cannot remember are not that much. It was not me that gloomy girl who cannot talk at all. No matter drunk or sober.
   I met some people yesterday and i am so sorry that they think very wrong about me. I dont know whether i can compensate it or no.
   Omg, my life in İstanbul has started so wrong! I dont even eat! I dont fucking eat anything at all. Which made me so easy to get drunk yesterday night! I have to start a normal life here. I hope it will happen as soon as i get a home.
   I hate myself now and i have some reasons to do it!
I think i just should go to my friend who has just returned from perugia. He knows that i am not a stupit drunk girl! I hate to be seemed like a moron drunk girl.
   I am not moron.
h.

Here You Go

2011-09-25T23:39:00.001+03:00

Ciao

I arrived to İstanbul this morning. So, everything is new for me. Everything, including me, is changed. Let's get it started.
Here i came İstanbul, let's see which one is bigger!
baci
H.

I wanna go there....

2011-09-21T12:26:00.002+03:00

I am craving to go there....

Victoria Falls, i will conquer you the day i step into Africa....
xoxo
H.

A Brand-New Life has started for me... I am not the one i was before....

2011-09-14T03:22:00.001+03:00

Ciaooooo

   I cannot explain how much i have missed to speak italian. I hate english! I just hate it! I write it hee because i feel i have to if i want someone to read these! I afraid i have forgotten speaking it beacause it's been nearly one month i have spoken loudly. I havent heard myself speaking it. F.ck!
   I am not sure if i have enough time an capacity to explain my last 8 months. But i can say that, i have grown up! May be too much, because most of the people around me or i meet here seem to me so childish, so immature and ignorant!
   I was always missing sth in my life which makes me sad all the time! I have found what makes me happy! The thing which makes me happy is TO TRAVEL! I cannot help but i just wanna travel! The only thing i was missing was travelling! So, by now, i have discovered it, i am the happiest person in the world. No matter how a life is waiting for me full of responsibilities!
   My experiences up until now have taught me a lot of things that now i cannot imagine myself one year ago! What a little child i was! I dont care anything but i will follow what i'd like to do! That's to travel! No matter how difficuties i will come across, like being a turkish needing a visa from bastards. I dont care. No one will be able to stop me!
   My life, literally, is standing by me, and i am looking at it as if i am watching a tv-serie. I dont know what will happen next week. I only have some prohecy. That's all.
   A brand-new life is waiting for me in İstanbul for the next season. I am so excited to see and experience it. Even though i most probably wont be able to find the chance to travel too often. I dont care. I just wanna take my popcorn and sit on my couch and watch my life. It will be fun i think. It was before that my life turns out to be boring.
   I just know two things for the close future. I will rent an apatment and i will get a scooter for me. That's all and enough to know beforehand:)
   I love my new life. I am reborn at the age of 21. che bello! figissimo!
   xoxo
   H.

Life is playing with me as if i am a toy

2011-05-24T21:04:00.000+03:00

Yes
This life really plays with me. Hey buddy, i am not a toy!
My dad returned to his job. Everything is ok.
I love you actually, my life, la mia dolce vita...
Ciao
H.

Just When You're in the Peak, Life Plays a Game and Sucks

2011-05-19T21:55:00.001+03:00

Ciao

This fucking life is so strange that you can get the worst news you can in a day when you're super happy, full of energy.
Yep, today i got one of the worst news i can ever get:
My dad lost his job.
The life is not fair!
...
H.

Perugia

2011-04-25T07:07:00.000+03:00

Ciao ragazzi,

Right now, again at that late hour, i am in front of computer, doing nothing, passing time. In the other room, i have a couchsurfer. I am a little bit nervous, not now, but i was. Because he is really strange. He is from New Zelland and he is 37 years old. When we asked him what he does for living, his answer was one of the strangest things i've ever heard: He is a record broker! Yes, yes, he said that he breaks records for Guiness Records Book. And in the world there is only one guy from NC, who has more records than him. It is really strange for me. He was tired and he wanted to sleep so i brought him to my apartment with a friend (cuz i was a little bit anxious) we made sure that he went sleeping then we went out. I returned back later, alone, and now i locked my room. I feel safe. Tomorrow i have to wake him up at 8:45 because his alarm clock is chinese, one day works one day doesnt. Strange. Life is really strange.

Whatever, because the weather will be bad tomorrow, i am not going to Pesaro, to te beach, fuck! I am in Perugia this weekend.

Anyway, some photos then:

ciao
H.

All you need is to Travel!

2011-04-18T04:35:00.000+03:00

Hi,

Even though i am not a big traveller, i know, and i am just in the beginning of it, i can share my experiences, i really got experienced... When you travel, until now, i understood that, everything, every single moment is an experience! It is so nice to live that moments! You know that you will remember later these seconds and you're aware of the fact that you're experiencing these! It is perfect! Just to feel like that i wanna travel!

To start with, as a general look, you're lucky when you travel, because you learn:

- Geographic location of the place you have visited (important, no matter how often you look at the map, it is not the same thing to have been to there)
- Climate of the place
- Diffirent kinds of animals or plants
- The physical appareance of the people living there
-The mentality of the people living there
-New ideas of anything about a city (even logistic)
- The food (it can be the most important thing, at least for me)
-A little bit history of the country
-The language (no matter how away from that language, you will be exposed to it and at least a few words you will learn, i think it deserves)
-General knowledge about anything which will help you if in the future you wanna go there again
etc.
etc.
etc.

If i am lucky, crazy, and stubborn enough to see the other parts of the world, i will tell you more about it. Now, i will just share my experiences about the places i have travelled (even though very limited).

Wish me luck, cuz i wish you the chance to travel, all of you who are reading this blog.
xoxo
H.

It is a shame that i dont write often!

2011-04-18T04:23:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

I just understood that (because i couldnt sleep) i should have shared my erasmus memories or travel memories here! Instead of uploading millions of photos on fb. But may be it is much easier for me just to add photos than writing. Why? Because writing brings thinking! Do i think of anything when i share photos on fb? No!

Anyway, i am not caring about anything, however, as much as crazy, i am an intellectual person, i know. No matter what others think! I need something which has more intellecual side than just appearance.

Anyway...

The people who know me here, in Perugia, shouldnt see what i am writing now. May be if they see, they would just think that i am more crazy!

But whatever, from now on, i will be a nice girl and sometimes i will talk about something logical.

My life is fucking beautiful and i am afraid that i wont be able to survive if i return back to my university. This Colombian issue also makes me uneasy about graduation. I afraid that i wont be able to graduate from my university too!

Whatever...

I am erasmus...

see this:

no words to speak...

ciao
H.

Madrid or Spain or CS or Friends or Our Big Family!

2011-04-17T15:59:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I dont know how to start or what to say or should i say or no but, erasmus is going WONDERFUL! It is the best thing in the world according to me or it is the best thing happening to me! I cannot describe how wonderful seconds i am passing. Every part of it is great and cool! For example, last week we went to Madrid, with my best friend here, Sara and Ümit, we did CS. It turned out to be a great experience because our host was awesome! We felt like home and we did everyting together.We went salsa parties, we played some games at home, we cooked, we ate together, we went for Barbekü, etc, etc, etc.
I cannot even describe how wonderful it is with te words!

From the first night, Salsa Party.

Our little family got bigger and bigger each day...

The next day, we really wanted to go to a cool discoteque, called Kapital. But we started to play a game and Limoncello, we ended up staying at home.

With Limoncello and Violencello...

After getting up, not much hangover:), we went to a barbekü. First we would do it on our terrace, the sun was shining but then a friend of Jesus called and it was better to do barbekü in their house outside of the city.

Our Family car with the new family member, a Polish girl.

and then the big party for what we came to Madrid.
.....

gueess what it is...

amiciiiiii

it is the end of part 1.
life is beautiful people!
xoxo
h.

Vay be, Erasmus'un 2. ayını da geride bıraktık! Olacak iş değil!

2011-04-04T06:07:00.000+03:00

Selam,
Saat çok geç oldu, yarın o kadar çok işim var ki anlatamam ama Barcelona fotoğraflarını illaki paylaşacağım, saatlerdir onlarla uğraşıyorum. Ne yapayım, çok beğendim, hastalık gibi bişi, bir başlayınca durduramıyosun. Saatlerimi aldı cidden! Bir yandan toparlandım, bir yandan fotoğraf paylaştım. Offf, evet, toparlanıyorum. Güzel evimden, odamdan taşınıp gidiyorum... Henüz kendime ait bir evim yok, Maria ve Marta ile kalacağım harika insanlar! Yurtta kalmak istemiyorum, 3 yıldır bıkmışım zaten, 150 euro diye mutfaksız italyada erasmusun ne manası var:)
Ev arayacağım, mecbur. Off çok zor, daha çok başka işlerim de var! Öncesinde kısaca başıma gelenleri anlatayım bari:
Her şey laylaylomdu. Hilal Slovenya'dan geldi, hem Milano'ya uğrayıp Sara'sını da gördü, hemen ertesi haftasonu Jessica ve Lone geldi. Hilal onları mutlu etmek, misafirlerini güzel ağırlamak için elinden geleni yaptı. Ama 2. günün sonunda Jessica Hilal'i çıldırttı ve Hilal Jessica'dan bir defa daha nefret etti. Çünkü Hilal'in iyi niyetini suistimale kalkışan Jessica, Hilal'e kendini bir hizmetçi gibi hissettirdi, İspanyol partisine giderken Hilal'in arkadaşları beklerken Hilal'in biraz hızlı olabilir miyiz çağrısı üzerine: 'özür dilerim ama makyajına 1 saat ayıran ben değildim' demesi üzerine Hilal açtı ağzını yumdu gözünü, bir daha da ne Jessica'nın yüzüne baktı ne doğru düzgün konuştu, ne de giderken sarılıp öptü. Ne yapsın Hilal, o da böyle bir insan işte. Kullanıldığının farkına vardığı zaman çıldırıyor. Ama gelgelelim ki, şeker mi şeker bitanecik Lone ne yaptı, Hilal'in her yaptığı iyiliği gördü, değer verdi, hep yardım etmeye çalışıp, teşekkür etti! Lone seni çok seviyorum bebeğim, hep sevdim, seveceğim...
Pazartesi sabah onları gönderdim, derse gittim, ama Gigi gelmedi. Hiç gelmedi ben de gitmedim zaten derse. Her neyse. Biletimin çıktısını aldım, Flippo harika bir insan! Sonra Cassia geldi, beni uğurlamaya. Hayat ne garip, Doruk 3 haftadır beni aramazken, Cassia'nın sevgilisi dakka başı arıyo bi dakka geç arasa kız sorun çıkarıyo:)
Trene son yolcu olarak yetişti Hilal, son saniyesinde. Her şey süperdi. Firenze'den Pisa'ya giderken biletini validation yaptırmadığı için 5 euro ceza yedi. Gene de her şey süperdi, Hilal Barcelona'ya gitti. Girona Havaalanından Jordi Hilal'i aldı, yemek yediler, ertesi gün erken kalkmak için anlaşıp uyudular. Ertesi gün Hilal Barcelona'da Magda ile buluşup çok güzel bir gün geçirdi. Bir çok yer gezdiler gördüler. Sangria için tortilla yediler. Akşamına Magda'nın arkadaşında hep beraber kaldılar, Meksikalı arkadaşları özel yemekler yaptılar gülüştüler eğlendiler, herkes Hilal'in ingilizcesini çok beğendi felan (çok şaşırtıcı)...
Ertesi gün Magda ve diğer polonyalı kızlar sabah erkenden gittiler ama Hilal öğlene kadar uyudu. Hep çok uyudu zaten. Bir ara dışarı çıktı, hardrock cafeye gitti, burger kinge dayanamadı oturdu yemek yedi. Aaaa, öncesinde elbette alışveriş yaptı, blanco'dan çok güzel bikini aldı, kendini dizginledi yoksa tüm bikini ve çantaları alacaktı. Sonra Albert'le buluştu. Ama Albert arabasıyla gelmişti, Hilal'in çantasıını aldılar kaldığı yerden ve Tividabo'ya gittiler. Sonra Albert iyi hissetmediği için eve gittiler. Sonra Bar Miguel denilen harika yere gittiler ve Juan onlara ispanyol tapasların tüm örneklerinden sundu. Her şey çok güzeldi. Albert Sara'yı beklediği için dışarı çıkılmadı film izlendi.
Ertesi gün de Barcelona'ya gidildi, marinaya, plaja, sonra da labirente. Akşamına parti vardı, ama küçük bir problem vardı, Albert futbolcu olduğu için tüm arkadaşları erkekti ve çooook az bir kısmı ingilizce konuşuyordu. Ama allahtan Hilal katalanca anlıyordu. Harika bir gece geçirdi Hilal, ama bilmiyordu ki o eğlenirken uçağı Girona'dan havalanmış, Pisa'ya gidiyor.
Ertesi gün saat 8 de uyanmayı umup 1 de uyanan Hilal, tarihin 1 Nisan olduğunu görünce şoka uğramış, biletine bakıp bir 31 mart yazısına bir 1 Nisan yazan tarihe bakarak, acı gerçeği anlamıştır. Cuma günü acı dolu geçmiştir. Harika bir alışveriş village'ine gidilmesine rağmen Hilal eve gidip uyumak istemiştir. Sonra da Jordi'nin yaptığı plana uymaya karar vermiştir. Jordi akşamüzeri Hilal'i gelip Albert'in evinden alıp Vic'e götürmüştür. Sonrasında Jordi'nin evine geçen Hilal ve Jordi, arkadaşının yeni audisiyle olan ilk günü olması dolayısıyla Juan'ı beklemiş, gelince de Vic'e yemeğe ardından da harika bir konsere gitmişlerdir. Hilal hayatında belki de ilk defa bu kadar sıfır bir arabaya binmiştir:))
Harika bir akşam geçiren Hilal, evine dönüp uyumuş, ertesi gün plaja gideceğini bildiği için içi içine sığmamıştır. Ama rüyasıında ok alakasız şeyler görmüş olup, tek hatırladığı Oğuzhan, mehmetin eski ev arkadaşı olmuştur. Ertesi gün plaja zorla da olsa gitmişler, Hilal çooook mutlu olmuş ve güneşlenmeye bronzlaşmaya çalışmıştır. İşe yarayıp yaramadığını hala bilmemektedir. Sonrasında Girona'ya giden Hilal çok beğenmiştir şehri. Sonrasında da Havaalanı, Pisa, havaalanından yasminin kardeşi ve sevgilisi Hilal'i almış ve eve gitmişlerdir. İlk defa bir İtalya'nı böyle güzel türkçe konuşurken görmüş, (ivana hariç) çok mutlu olmuştur.
Ertesi gün evine gelen Hilal, Perugia'yı evini ne kadar sevdiğinin farkına bir kez daha varmıştır. Ama kader çoktan ağlarını örmüş, kötü kalpli ev sahibi Hilal'in odasını yaşlı ve çalışan bir kadına iki katına kiralamıştır. Zavallı Hilal arkadaşlarını aramış, ve hepsi yardımcı olmaya çalışmış olsa da başta kötü hissetmiştir. Evinden ayrılmak çok zor gelmiştir. Amma velakin, bir yandan fb a fotoğraf koyarken bir yandan da tüm eşyalarını toparlamış, ertesi gün ispanyolların evine taşımak için hazırlamıştır.
Halen daha uyumamış olan Hilal, yarın erken kalkmak zorundadır. Uykusuzluğun mu şaşkınlığın mı verdiği saflıkla bu satırları yazan Hilal, artık son defa yatağında uyumalı, erken kalkıp, önce kaçırdığı sınavı telafi yolları aramalı, sonra da başını sokacak bir ev aramalıdır. İki gün sonra Madrid'e gidecek olan Hilal bakalım ev bulabilecek mi? Ev bulamazsa yurtta mı kalmak zorunda kalacak? Yurtta kalmamak için tüm opsiyonları değerlendirecek mi? Maria ve Marta Hilal'e evini ne kadar süreyle açacak? Çok yakında....
H.

Life in Perugia Again (Erasmus Life)

2011-02-07T03:07:00.000+02:00

Ciao

I have completed one week in Perugia, the very beginning of my erasmus life and i want to share my experiences with you.
As everyone knows, i was so unwilling to leave İstanbul and to come to Perugia for six months because i was thinking that i would get bored. However, now i think that how stupit i was! This is great!
Everything is great.
In the first dates i mean first and second day may be you can be bored and blue, then everything goes on its way!
Actually, today is Sunday and is the only day i've not go out since i've come here.
The first day, there was a welcome part in Merlin Pub. To give you a little tip; in here, the parties start with the dinner or apperative, the places which seem in the beginning as a restaurant later turn out to be a club or bar. They take the tables out so everyone dances.
The second day, i went to a salsa party with a group of erasmus students. It was ok, but i didnt have fun as much as i got the previous day. So i was a little bit upset that day and the next day.
The third day, we had dinner in tmy apartment with my flatmates and chilled out a bit, then i went to Velvet. When i went there, everyone was eating. Actually, here everything is so cheap that with 5 euro, you can eat a lot of things, and you can drink even. I mean, theyprepare a open buffet after getting your first drink, which costs 5 euro, you can eat from the buffet. That day, i really got drunk.I slept at one of my friend's house, Sara. I like her so much that i cannot explain. There is something special with her. Most of the people here are fake actually, i understand ok, they need to behave that way but this girl is honest i think, with his friendliness.

I can say that, the only friend of me is her. Of course not the only friend but, the only one i can depend on. Doesnt she look like Büşra?
Anyway, the fourth day, i went to a house party in the house of Polish girls. They are really sweet. That day i didnt drink too much or i didnt stay long. I left early and went to home.
The fifth day, we went to a trip to Assisi, may be this trip deserves a post. The night, Omg, was different than all these erasmus parties. Because we would meet with my dearest friend Mili, but i would join them later because i needed to rest after returning from Assisi. So like midnight they picked me up from my house and we went to a house first. I met the people there, then we went to a discoteque. It was not very very very awesome, i mean compared to ones in İstanbul it was nothing but anway it was ok. However the guy who drove us was so desperate and hitting on all the time. I am gifted that i can get these boys away from me. :) Anyway, the night ended in a weird way. I was dacing with an italian boy, and kissing, then Mili came with a surprise. What happened is as such:
When she was alone, Mili was talking to a girl who was working there in a Geisha costume. I am sure that she didnt think that she could create a problem for her. But before leaving the girl kisses Mili from the chicks and from the mouth with her toung, and her leg is touching her pussy.
She was shocked that everyone was staring at her. Then she came and we left. When she was telling how she kissed her, the italian boy said 'cosi', and he kissed me again. Anyway, in the car he asked for my phone number and i gave to him.
That's all. Poor boy, the other boy, unfortunately couldnt find a girl. I am so sorry for him. I am so sorry for these type of people.
Anyway, i spent the night at Mili's house, we talked with George about what happened that night. Then we came to my place and talked to Lamia for hours, including Mili:)
And that's all! I am here! Today i really needed to rest, because tomorrow will be hard day. My course starts at 8! fuck!

xoxo
Ciao
H.

Weird People in Italy, Trying to Make Money

2011-01-23T03:32:00.000+02:00

Hi,

I was eliminating some photos from my folders. The photos were among the ones i took when i was in Italy. I was there just for a month and there are such a lot of photos that i afraid there wont be enough space for the new ones. So i decided to eliminate some and the thing i came across was those weird people who died all of their faces and in weird costumes, trying to make money in the streets. I will show you some examples from different cities now.

This pix is from Rome, when i first went there. I was amazed. I really thought that this was not living so when she directly looked at me, i was terrified!

Rome

From Naples, Napoli.

This guy is pretty normal:) From Napoli again, i wanted to share because i liked it.

From Firenze, Florance, i am sorry i couldnt turn it over.Use your neck please.

Ok. This is fake:) From Venezia, Venice. I do not remember if i met such people in Venezia.

Yes, these were the ones i could find the photos. There were many others. Especially in touristic and crowded cities such as Rome, Florance, and Naples. These people earn their life as such. I respect. But i also heard that some of them are assholes because they charge a lot just for a photo and they make you pay. My dearest friend Tamara told me that she had to pay 10 euro just for a picture in Rome.

Just to keep in mind.

I love you.

Xoxo

Poseidon Temple

2011-01-21T02:43:00.000+02:00

Hi,

I just wanted to share my thoughts and itself, Poseidon Temple with you. Because i admire there, i wanted also you to be familiar with it and if your way goes to Athens by chance, do not pass without seeing it. Poseidon Temple is situated in Sounion, the very south of Athens. The area is just great! Georgous! My friend, Koni, told me its myth. As far as i know, Poseidon was waiting his son, of course with his soldiers, to return from a war. He told him beforehand that if the ships carry a black flag, this means that you're dead and we lost the war. He waited for his son just in front of where his temple is today. After some time, he saw the ships closing. He searched for the flag of course. Unfortunately, he saw a black flag swinging. He was devastated because he thought that his son was dead. Then he could not bear this sorrow any more and he jumped into the water. However, it was inutile, because his son was not dead. He was alive. However, just because his wife died during their journey, the black flag was waving.
I am not very sure that the people are correct here but as far as i remember from what Koni said to me, its legend was like that.
I've been to Athens for 7 days and even though i enjoyed every meters of it, i admire here, Poseidon Temple. It was my peak! When i look at my photos from the summer 2010, i cannot change anything with the photos and memories in Poseidon Temple. I wish i could go there at least once more in my life. Here are the pictures:

Gaza Gelme

2011-01-21T02:22:00.000+02:00

Merhabaaaaaaaaaa

Bilmem kaçıncı sefer türkçe kayıtla çıkıyorum karşınıza. Bi kaç türkçe blog okudum, gaza geldim. Yok başlıktaki gaza gelme bu değil, başka!
Bildiğiniz üzere bu günleri Burdur'da, evimde, sessiz sakin, huzurlu geçiriyorum. Ama, internette ne yapıyorum dersek, hiç bu kadar sessiz sakin değil aslında, çılgın ve aşırı hızlı bir 6 ayın planlarını yapıyorum aslında. Sürekli uçak biletleri bakılıyo, planlar yapılıyo, avrupadaki arkadaşlarla konuşuluyo vb. vb. vb.
Bugün biletimi de sonunda alabildim. Şu an gerçekten gaza gelmiş durumdayım. Hadi deseniz geleceğim o kadar!
Gezme konusunda dibine vurmak istiyorum. Keşke derslerim olmasa. Korkuyorum aslında bu kadar çok gezersem italyancamı ilerletemem diye ama, ne yapalım, her şey nasip!
Her türlü gaza geldim, bir başkası da; Gizem beni epey gazladı, Elif ve Burcum'um da gazlarıyla bakalım, kim tutacak beni.
Meraklıyım, farklı hissediyorum. Evim iyi hoş da çok pahalı. Neden bilmiyorum ama onu tutmak istedim. İki italyan kızla kalacağım. Birini gördüm, hiç güzel değil:P Değiştiririm belki. Bakalım şubatta bir kalalım.
Hayat al götür beni, senin elindeyim tamamen! Bıraktım kendimi!
Ben de merak içindeyim, merak ediyorum Hilal'in önümüzdeki maceralarını!
Bakalım, göreceğiz...
H.

My Students

2011-01-18T02:00:00.000+02:00

Hi,

Today i just left İstanbul, my dream city, where i can live only. Ohh, i am becoming sensitive about it. Anyway, i will miss everything, everywhere, and everyone there. However, i will miss someone more than others: my sweet, little kids, students of course! They are just three years old but most of them are either bilingual or multilingual. For example there are french kids, they speak french with each other, english in the class and with the other students, however some of them also understands turkish and answers in turkish when necessary. There is a boy, named Koni, he is german, he is turkish-german bilingual i guess, and he is also very proficient in english. There was a german boy whose name was Tristan, and he was wonderfully beautiful, all of them are beautiful but his eyes were amazing. Actually i really want to share their photos but i afraid that this can create a problem. Tristan' mum raised him as german-french bilingual. His english was excellent. He was speaking french with the frecnch kids and english with the others.
There are some indian students, cute little creatures. There is one who is Kushal, he is the youngest in the class, 2,3 years old. He can barely speak his native language and he had never heard english before september, but last week, he tried to tell me in english and i could understand him.
I will only share a few photos with you because this can really be a problem for the parents without their permission. But they were my students, i was with them all the time! They were mine. Ohhh, God, i will miss them a lot!
Lastly, i wanna talk a little about my favorite ones. Omg, how can they be such beautiful and intelligent. Deniz and Asya, the twins. They are incredibly naughty and intelligent. God if one day i will also get a child, please i want just like them no matter how difficult it will be to raise them. They are real calamities both for the parents and the caretaker. But, i love them! I just wanna be with them all the time! I will never be bored when i am with them, especially with Asya. Deniz is also awesome but, Asya is a bit more mature than her. We had a deeper relationship with her. Deniz can sometimes be childish. Hahahaha. Of course because she is three years old.::)))
But look, who can say they are not the best creatures in the world:

Deniz.

Asya

God, they are awesome, i just want kids like them.

Deniz

Asya

Both of them are wearing these shoes.

Appoline

Runa

I really desire to put the photos here but i think i am not allowed to so, these cabn also be enough to understand my feelings i guess.

I love them.

I love kids.

Ciaooo

baci

Mine Vaganti - Scena finale

2011-01-11T03:01:00.000+02:00

Gizem

2011-01-11T02:44:00.000+02:00

Hi,

I just wanted to share my dear friend Gizem with you. I like her so much. She is one of the few people i really enjoyed life when i am with. Especially in taksim:P

here we are:

The hair is new. She is crazy and i like crazy people!
ciao
H.

Stupid Girl!

2011-01-06T01:25:00.000+02:00

God!
I m being stupid and stupid today, tonight!
Please if you wouldnt study my dear, Hilal mou, please sleep at least!
Do something utile!
Go and die!
bye

Unexpected Conditions

2011-01-01T21:33:00.000+02:00

Hi,

Now I've been in Kadir's house for 24 hours. We have a commune life here. I do not know how many people we are. Some o the people went to their dormitories but returned back to here. This experience of me is one of the most bizarre memories of me. The reason for its being bizarre is that we do nothing here. Just nonsense. But it is fun though.
Yesterday we celebrated the New Year here. I brought rakomelo, which George brought me from Greece, and we ordered vodka, we drank drank and drank. I was so happy and drunk. I was not badly drunk but i enjoyed the night, so i was beautiful, my my was so beautiful. We really had fun even though i had thought the contrary.
We all gave to each other new year presents and the boys had a surprise for the girls. In the first seconds o the new year they each gave a rose to one of the girls. It was so kind and i really enjoyed it. Then people gave their presents to each other. But most of us, included me, were drunk. Especially i was so drunk that i could barely see and understand my present. Ahmet bought me a parfume bottle. It is so elegant. I thanked him a lot.
I really do not remember all the details but like 4, i went to sleep.
The second part starts here:)
I think first Tuğçe got up. Then one by one all of us woke up. We had breakfast. Then someone slept, we played Scrabble, i slept, and i got up and we decided to cook. I went to shopping and we cooked Kısır, a special dish.
And, we played Monopoli, and i bankrupted. So that is why i am here and writing on my blog. I do not know how many people are still playing or doing anything else.
My battery went off, so i cannot see any of the messages or calls on my phone. And i should go to Taksim i know but i dont wanna leave here. I am so happy here now.
But i promised to Alessio and there will be other italians as well. I should go. And today again i have invitiations to Bronx. Of course, i wanna go to listen to Jukebox. My favorite band.
I am with my same clothes for the last 24 hours. I should go to my room but i dont wanna.
I do not know what to do. Let's see.
Bye for now.
Xoxo
H.

Heading Off Africa

2010-12-27T02:11:00.000+02:00

Hi,

I wanna tell you that i just made up my mind to go to africa and help people there and experience being there. Today i went to a meeting, and i met with a doctor, who is officially working in Üsküdar Govermental Hospital but who is in the same time working voluntarily for the people in Africa. He made a mini presentation of their last trip to Nijer. I was so fascinated by the photos and the stories he told us. I talked to him and asked him whether i can also join them or not. He said to me that of course i can join but he noted that i should know french a bit. Beause the bastards, French people colonilised there and they made people learn their language. I cannot understand these people, why do you need such a lot of money? How can you spend the money while there are millions of people dying from hunger? I cannot beleive.
Especially for Nijer, this country is rich of Uranium. Can you beleive that such a country is dying of hunger? He told us that they are living 1000 thousand years before us. I cannot think of it!
Do you know where Nijer is?

This country has the broadest territory in Africa.15 millions of people are living there. Most of its territory is dessert area. The avarage age for people to live is 41. Isnt it terrfying?

In Nijer, at my birthday, in 18 February 2010, there happened a military coup. I just learned it. At my birthday, it is so meaningful:)

Most of the population is Muslims. There is only one airport in the country, the French built it in Niamey, the capital city.

I really wanted to share you some photos but i couldnt download them. He showed us a lot of photos they took.

I applied to go. I wish they will decide soon and let me go there. I will bring a lot of, such a lot of sweets and stuff to give children. I cannot stand when we are dying from obesity, they are dying of hungary.

The world is not fair.

I just want you people, just think a second, HOW LONG HAVE YOU STAYED HUNGRY?
Think about it please, and then think that how the risk of not finding any food for the next 24hours or longer can be. Remember when you are extremely hungry you are starving.
Then think about these people.
I love people
H.

Mine Vaganti (Serseri Mayınlar)

2010-12-25T03:04:00.001+02:00

Hi,

I cannot stop but write you about Mine Vaganti. Even though it is already a week since i saw the movie, i cannot stop listening to the song '50 mila' by Nina Zilli.
The movie, i loved it!
It was very very successful, according to me.
It was a movie by Ferzan Özpetek which was passed in Lecce, in south Italy.

I fell in love with Tomasso, who is actually Riccardo Scamarcio. I wish to meet him at a time. I just learned that he was engaged. But who knows, the future will show us everything.

But he is so hot! How cant i fall in love with him?

After watching some italian movies, now i strongly beleive that the guys in italy are hot. You know i've been to italy but i did not think that italian boys are as handsome as they are told. However, now i am sure! He is my type! God, i feel like a high school girl:) Anyway, i have the chance to observe at least, as i am going to italy, may be not soon, but i will end up going there for at least 5 months.

Tomasso, i mean, Riccardo was so handsome but he was not the only beautiful person in the movie, see these beautiful people also:

These girl, Nicole Grimaudo is also so beautiful. I admire her.

He is also awesome, the brother of Tomasso, Antonio, Alessandro Preziosi.

And, of course the song, 50 mila! I love it! I feel so well after listening to it.
Here the link for the trailer of the movie and also you can listen to the song:
Mine Vaganti Trailer

Here are the lyrics of the song by Nina Zilli:

50mila di Nina Zilli feat. Giuliano Palma

Cinquantamila lacrime
non basteranno perchè
musica triste sei tu dentro di me.
Cinquantamila pagine
gettate al vento perchè
eterno è il ricordo, il mio volto per te
Non ritornare,
no tu non ti voltare,
non vorrei mi vedessi cadere.

Rit. A me piace così,
che se sbaglio è lo stesso,
perchè questo dolore è amore per te.

Cinquantamila lacrime
senza sapere perchè
sono un ricordo lontano da te.
Cinquantamila lacrime
non basteranno perchè
musica triste sei tu dentro di me.
Non mi guardare,
non lo senti il dolore,
brucia come un taglio nel sale.

Rit. A me piace così,
che se sbaglio è lo stesso,
perchè questo dolore è amore per te.

A me piace così,
e non chiedo il permesso,
perchè questo dolore è amore per te.

Ciao
H.

Kadın

2010-12-25T02:17:00.000+02:00

Hi,

I was reading a book and these part took my attention and i really wanted to share it with you:

'Hint mitolojisinde kadının yaratılışı şöyle anlatılır: 'Tanrı, yaprağın hafifliğini, ceylanın bakışını, güneş ışığının kıvancını, sisin gözyaşını aldı; rüzgarın kararsızlığını, ateşin yakıcılığını, kışın soğuğunu, saksağanın gevezeliğini, kumrunun sevgisini kattı. Bütün bunları karıştırdı, eritti ve kadın yaptı. Yarattığı kadını sevsin diye erkeğe armağan etti.''

So, Indian miteology must have forgotten to add ability to decieve and foxiness to the features of women which are condradicting with each other. Because, the other beliefs attribute also destrcutive qualifications to these creatures who are charming, misterious, nonstable, unreliable but in the same time compassionate and affectionate.

Tam Hayatım Nomal Seyrediyo Sanıyorum, Yanılıyorum

2010-12-21T02:37:00.002+02:00

Selam

Neden sonra Hilal bloğuna Türkçe yazmaya karar vermiş bulunuyor. Meyvesi de bu kayıt. Nedir Hilalciğimi böyle bir karar iten ben de bilemedim. İçinden geliyo yazıyo diyelim, fazla kurcalamayalım.Belki Candan ablanın arkadan 'Yalan, yalan' diye bağırması olabilir. Uyku gözlerinden akıyorken, tam bilgisayarı kapatmak üzereyken durup da bloğa yazması hayra alamet mi değil mi henüz bilmiyoruz. Kaydın sonunda karar veririz herhalde diye düşünüyorum.
Göksel'den Depresyon açıldı ki, alsın götürsün şarkılar onu, nereye isterse.
Hilal Hatun'un hayatı niye adam gibi, normal insanların hayatları gibi gitmiyo bir bilen çıkar mı acaba? Nedir abi bu hatunun olayı? Her bi bokun arafında kalması mı? Fazlasıyla özgün olduğundan mı bi baltaya sap olamıyo mesela? Hiç bir grup, hiç bir ideoloji tatmin etmez mi bir insanı? Özgünlük denmez de mallık mı denir, acayiplik mi? Aslında istemiyo artık herkesten farklı olmayı o da. O da herkes gibi olmak istiyo ama olamıyo, oldurulmuyo. Karşısına sürekli türlü türlü engeller naneler çıkıyo. Herkes canını sıkıyo, canını acıtıyo. Ama o kimsenin canını yakamıyo, onu gerçekten sevenler hariç. Allahın cezası, kim ona değer verirse kıymet bilmiyo, nerde iki yüzlü, pislik insan varsa bi bok sanıyo onları. Cool olcam diye hep yalnız kalıyo bu hatun ya. Cool olmazsa olmaz mı? Her gün sorgulanıyo ama olamıyo işte. Bir şey planlamıyo hep spontene yaşıyo aslında, belki de sorun tam olarak da buradan kaynaklanıyo. Düşünmüyo kim iyi kim kötü...
Hep kötüler var ama dünyada. İyiler o kadar az ki, o kadar az ki, o kadar az ki...
İyi mi Hilal? İstemeyerek de olsa bu sorunun cevabı 'Evet'. Hiç istemiyo aslında iyi olmayı, kötülerin hep kazandığını biliyo, hep kötü olmak istiyo ama olamıyo, hiç bir zaman da olamayacak biliyorum.
Çok iyi tanıyor muyum onu derseniz; ben de bilmiyorum aslında ne kadar tanıdığımı.
Çocuktu önce bir onu biliyorum, ama büyüdü. Çok büyümemiş olsa da büyüdü. Ama saflığı geçemedi, hep inandı insanlara, inanmaması gerektiğini bile bile inandı. Saçma sapan işlerle uğraşıyo hep zaten. Hayattan tatmin olmaya çalışıyo, ama ne zaman şimdi oldu, mutluyum dese, gene dönüyo dolaşıyo, eski hayatına geri dönüyo. Bir şeyler hep eksik kalıyo. Belki onda da eksik bir şeyler.
Çok şaşırıyo bazen insanlar onu sevmediği zaman. Anlam veremiyo, ne yaptım da bu insan beni sevmedi diye. Çok kişi tanımaya çalışmıyo, tanımıyo onu aslında. Ama tanıyanlar, gerçekten onu bilenler çok seviyorlar onu. Başta zor bir insan belki ama, tanımaya değer bence. Çok tatlı. Samimiyim. Torpil geçmiyorum. Üniversiteye geldikten sonra daha az kitap okumaya başlasa da, gazete dergi takip eder, hep boş işler peşinde gezmez.
Kadınlar hoşlanabilmeyi ister en çok, erkeklerin ne adi olduklarını bilir, ama doğası gereği mümkün olmaz, erkeklerden hoşlanır. Aslında onlardan da hoşlanmaz dersem abartmış olurum. Aseksüel değil elbette ama, erkeklerin iki yüzlülüğü, iğrençilkleri, değer vermeyişleri tiksindirmiştir onu. Vücudundan hoşlanan, onun düşüncelerine sözlerine değer vermeyen, onunla konuşmayan erkeklerden nefret eder. İçten içe de intikam alır erkeklerden, hiç bir zaman ona sahip olamayacaklarını düşündükçe.
Boyunu hep problem ederdi, yaklaşık bir yıllık bir problemi idi ama sanırım sonunda çözdü; çünkü çok güzel bir vücudu olduğunu keşfetti. Artık kendini çok beğeniyor. Ama bana öyle geliyor ki, hiç bir zaman aşık olamayacak. Onun aşkını hakedecek bir erkek yok daha. Şimdilik dünyada olmadığını düşünüyor ama belki vardır da o henüz tanışmamıştır. Bilmiyorum. O da bilmiyor. Kimse bilmiyo.
Yeni dövme yaptırdı ama henüz daha içselleştiremedi, yorum bile yapamıyorum. Ne çok seviniyo, ne de pişman. Bir şey bilmiyo. Zaman gösterecek.
Çok mutlu olamasa, hayatında her şey yolunda gitmese, kimi şeyleri yaşayamasa bile, en azından bir şeyden emin ki; o da kendini kandırmadığı. İğrendiği çıkar ilişkilerini yaşamadı hiç, ne erkeklerle yalancı duygusal bir şekilde ne de arkadaşlık bağlamında. Her zaman doğrucu oldu, belki de asıl sorun tam olarak da bu idi.
Boşver güzelim. Ben onu tanıyorum ya, ve çok seviyorum, gerçekten sevilmeye değer bir insan olduğuna inanıp seviyorum onu, çok, çok seviyorum.
Bir tane Hilal var. Elimizde nümunelik o da.
İtalyaya gidiyo numune 2. dönem. Bakalım ne maceralar yaşayacak.
kaydın altına kim imza ataak merak ettim.
ben kimim?
hiç kimse

Strange Days, Strange Decisions

2010-12-18T01:57:00.000+02:00

Hi,

Can you imagine what i just have done? I have a tattoo now:)))
Yes, i did it. I finally did it.
I have an anchor on my back now. It is a very diffirent feeling to have something new with you.
I will let you see my new brand tattoo later. First i should get used to it.
Moreover, to have it made me feel very well, because i was so strange and i did not know what to think how to feel these days. It was very good for me to have something new or change something in your life.
Life is so strange guys. I love it most of the time but sometimes it sucks.

To be continued.

Ciao
xoxo
H.

UNDERWEAR

2010-12-15T15:26:00.000+02:00

Hi,

Even though it will be a little bit strange, i will talk about underwears. The reason for this is the fact that, i, again bought a coulple of new underwear for myself. I just cant stop but buy everything i saw. I love it! I love them! Even though i will not be able put my new underwear photos here, i will show you some examples from my taste:
La SENZA:
(please do not focus on her body:)

La Senza is my favorite. I love itttt. In Italia, my money went to food and underwear only because there are calzedonia:

Of course intimissimi follows:

I beleive that there is nothing more beautiful than a bra. I love them. Poor men, they cannot wear these beautiful pieces of clothes.

I love them, colorful, beautiful, good quality.

For the ones who tell 'whuu, why did you need to write them down, underwears are our secters', go and fuck yourselves. There is nothing more natural than underwear. I love underwearssss...

Bye
H.

Easy Stanza

2010-12-15T02:23:00.001+02:00

Hi,

Today i wanted to give you a little bit information about finding a place to stay in Italy. Who knows may be a day will come and you will need a house in Italy. Anyway here is the website:
http://www.easystanza.it/content/common/account.aspx?redirectOnSingle=1
Even though they charge in order to send messages, at least you can find rooms for you, you an have an idea.

Actally the main reason to give this website to you is that i am freaking out trying to find a room both from Siena, for a month, and from Perugia, for five months.

God, help me find a really beautiful house with cool flatmates!

bye
H.

Yasemin

2010-12-11T01:55:00.000+02:00

Hi people,

Today i am with one of my dearest friends, Yasemin:

She is one of the cutest creatures in the world. I like her very very very much. She has missed her boyfriend because he studies in Italy now. He is doing his master there and Yasemin is planning everything according to him. He is coming İstanbul next week and she has planned everything, and now she has just bought her ticket to go to Italy after he leaves Turkey. They are so cute, God, bless them. Some people are lucky in that world because they have the love. However I do not have love. But i beleive, one day i will also have love, real love inside, deep inside me. Even though i think i am not romantic, i think there is another Hilal, really really inside of me, and she is extremely romantic.

Xoxo

Best Weekend

2010-12-06T00:42:00.000+02:00

Hi

I will tell you that i think i am recovering from mt depression. The reason for it is that i dont remember what i was thinking how i was feeling the previous weeks. Now i feel pretty well.
Actually i have a lot to write here but i dont have any time to spend on internet. So i will briefly mention my weekend. Afret getting free from my presentation: Desuggestopedia, on Friday, while the weather was extremely sunny and i nearly didnt see any sun. I encountered one of my friends by chance on the road, while returning back to my room because i didnt have any plans, the plans were cancelled, may be only at niight we would play guitar hero. Then i suggested going to taksim she accepted. We went. As she was thinking herself as a lezbian, first we went to find a girl in lezbian bars, then we went to kb where my friend is working. we chilled out there. then we called one commen friend of us. we three enjoyed the day a lot. but a lot!
we stayed in his house that day, it was just next to the hotel where george stayed when he was here, it means 3 minutes to asmalı mescid.
on saturday we got up had breakfast and i went to my training: Theatre and dictation.
Then my friends came, Kadir first, then Cihan and Betül, then i went to Yasemin's birthday party, they went to another place, then i joined them. Then we left them again, went to asmalı mescid, kb etcetcetc.
The weekend may be not the best weekend of me, but it was legendary.
xoxo
H.

Ece Temelkuran

2010-11-29T01:50:00.000+02:00

Hi,

I want you to have a look at her page. Seconda me molto brava a lei.

http://tr.ecetemelkuran.com/?p=1386

DEPRESYON

2010-11-25T00:54:00.000+02:00

Hi,
How can you understand that a person is getting through a depression?
Look at me

H.

Huzur

2010-11-25T00:50:00.000+02:00

Hi,

In that photo, i am so happy and calm. I wish the life would be such easy and calm... Just like sitting just beside the lake with your best friend. But the life is not that easy...

You're seperated from your friend and you're into a chaos.

I need to learn to live...

best wishes

AYRILIK

2010-11-23T23:56:00.000+02:00

Hi,

Now i am in a bus travelling from Burdur to Antalya. Because there is not an airport in Burdur, I have to go to Antalya first, and because my flight is early in the morning, I have to go night before and spend the night in my cousin’s house then take a taxi to the place where shuttles are leaving for airport, and finally I can take my flight.

It is so difficult for me, once more, to say goodbye to my family: My mum, my dad, and my sister.

Let me tell you a bit about my farewell.

From the first time of my departure for İstanbul, all of our neighbors, friends, and relatives come to say goodbye to me. Even they cry. I cry. My mum cries. Everyone tries to conceal that s/he is crying. I cannot talk on phone. My voice goes...

I miss my family and friends very much...

Why people have to say goodbye to the loved ones?

....

Mother and Child

2010-11-21T00:43:00.000+02:00

I just love my mum...

Even though i am such an asshole moth of the time, i love her very much!
xoxo
h.

Last Few Days, may be Weeks...

2010-10-29T04:15:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I havent written for a long time i know. If i havent written for a long time and i'm telling this to you, that means something: Watch Out! This will be a looooonngggg text. But dont worry this time, it wont suck! There will be an order of what i wanna tell you!

The first issue is of course that fucking little asshole thing. I mean the boy i met in the party has turned out to be an asshole! How he can be such an asshole in that age i really wonder! In short, the issue related to him and the fact our birthdays are the same went into the depths of history!

Secondly, i wanna summarize what happened in my life since my last entry, after the party. The next weekend was desperating for me! I was so alone and desperate. I think i was in a depression. I went to gym on Saturday, and met Eric there, and then i tried to call many people but no one was available! I was fucking alone and i wanted to go to Taksim. I did nothing. It was all i can tell about that weekend! I was an idiot! I thought i was alone but now i recall that i had a lot of people i should have called!

The next weekend after that stressful days, i hit it off! On Saturday night we went to Taksim with my high school friends, Seçil, Emre, Aydın, Yusuf. W had a lot of fun in Ritim Roof, even though i dont like there i hate there normally but that night we had a lot of fun. Then we went to Merter. We chatted and we watched some soup operas then like 6 or 7 in the morning, we fell asleep. We got up at 5 in the afternoon. We had a big breakfast and then Seçil and I left. I came to the room. I rested for some time and i went out with Cihan, Kadir and Betül. I had four free tickets to enter bronx, for the Jukebox concert.

Let me tell that beautiful night. First we went to eat some börek. Then we went to J'adore, and drunk hot chocolate. Then we went to bronx and we just had fun! It was great! I like the feeling that i am having fun with my close and real friends. We decided to miss the 3 shuttle because we really were having fun. Then ohh, sth happened i dont wanna remember. Let's just say we ate sth and we took a cap and returned to the university. We went to petek and cilled out. I got angry with sth and left for my dorm.

The next weeks went so fast because the courses have started to get harder and harder. FUck! I dont wanna study but i have to!

But wait for the great news! GEORGE comes hereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!
He already bought a ticket! He will be here on Wednesday until Monday! It is really a lmited period i know but again we will see each other! This is perfect! Tomorrow i will search an hotel for him. This is a shame that i wont be able to provide him accommodation, because i still dont have a house in İstanbul! But i strongly beleive that our friendship is not sth temporary so in the following years i will have an apartment on my own! I will show him everything beautiful and different here! I wish he would be so happy to come here, even though it is for 5 days.

Finally, if i need to tell the present i feel so great! I mean today was a very good and different day for me! I worked, from 1 to 11. haha. It was so cool. I worked in autoshow fair here, in İstanbul. It was amazing. I went there at 1 but we started to work at 4 may be. Until 4, we went around with some friends, a coincidence, and we really had fun! We even had massage, and we played sth you enter and watch sth with 5 dimensions: simuliator?

Today i made a lot of friends. I really had fun. I ate a lot! This may be the thing i should regret! Also, just buy chance, i didnt have to wait for the shuttle, or wait for the shuttle to go to their houses first, i came here in a car; because one of the friends lives in Etiler and he came by car! I was so lucky!

Actually tomorrow i will have breakfast with the sister of Büşranur but i dont wanna sleep today, i dont know why! George said to me wait for me a bit and let's talk before you sleep. OMG. It is already 4, i have to sleep!

Byeeee
H.

weirdissimooooooooooooo

2010-10-10T04:13:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I will tell you sth, for me, pretty interesting. But i wont tell you the whole story. It is a bit special to me! In one of our school's parties, i met a guy, literally speaking, two years younger than me, but his birthday is also 18th of february! I didnt beleive in him in the beginning, because i thought it is impossible to have the same day as birthday! That is another part! I started to dance with him, i didnt understand how but, i had seen him before i got drunk, and i really liked him. But now, i cant remember very well how he looked like. There is only one thing in my mind about his appearance, or everything with him: that is he was like Burak very much! I know, thins fucking Burak, the asshole affected my life, my thouhgt very much! Even though i totally, very very totally forgot him a longgggg time agooo, when i am drunk, i think i think the boy with me like Burak. May be in the beginning i didnt think like that but, when we started to talk, after a word of him: ' I also have criteria, it better not to have one if she is not beautiful' everything was like a dejavu for me! He didnt mean you're not beautiful, contrary he kept saying that i am beautiful, but it was a dejavu for me! Fuck you burak i hate you!
I remember i gave him my number, but he didnt call me yet! It is his decision!
It is my destiny. I wont do anything in my life, i will just wait and see what's going on!
I gave myself to alcohol these days. I say i wont, and drink a shot of ouzo or whatever i can find!
Wish me luck in my life.
I need it!
I dont expect anything!
Just some reality!
xoxo.
H.

Çok düşündüm kaçayım diye ama dedim, ne zaman anlaşmış ki kalple beyin?

2010-10-06T03:07:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

Adesso e piu tardi per me, perche lo sapete io sono una studentessa, che cazzo! Domani ho tanti lezioni.
Sento io molto diverso come sempre:P
Perche sto ascoltando la musica di teoman. Lo sapete Teoman, un canzone famoso in Turchia.
Lui dice:
Non voglio morire:
prima di fare sesso,
prima di vedere il mare,
prima di sentire l'amore
prima di amore qualcuno
prima di fare tutti belli
.....
sempre rimana con me!

prendame come io sono nella mia paese.

Çoban Yıldızı

se tu hai tempo, un po piu....

amoreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

troviami!

ciao.
baci
h.

Urgency

2010-10-04T01:28:00.001+03:00

hi,

Today, it was a different day for me, i came up with a lot of decisions again and again. First one; i wanna change my department if i can. Second, i need a boyfriend i'm sure and it's urgent. Third one is that i should do sth with my hair and my face, because according to me i look awful. Fourth; after graduation i should live in another city, another big city, but it shouldnt be as cold as İstanbul, may be Athens, after having learned a perfect greek. Fifth; i should study italian, because in my class nearly everyone speaks it fluently but fuck, i have forgotten a lot! Sixth and one of the most important ones; i should find a good job, because fuck everything i dont have money. Because i dont have money, my credit cards do not work, because they dont work, i cant go shopping.
Fuck that chain.
But, i'm sure i need a boyfriend now. Right now!

omg.
bb
h.

Nothing related to it:P

2010-09-30T01:51:00.000+03:00

ciaoooooooooooooooooooo

sono ubriaca adesso. p per favore scusarmi, perche scritto quando sono ubriaca, non e molto bene cosi, pero, guardi questo:

ciaooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
baci
h.

In a park in Lara, Antalya

2010-09-25T01:54:00.000+03:00

Hi,

Can you imagine how magnificient to lie down on grasses, in Lara, and to know that the Mediterrean is in front of you, and the weather is just awesome! And you're with your sister and cousin! But you can guess we were in Turkey because i am covering my legs:P
This was greattttt! I wont be able to forget that day! I loved it! I admired Lara!
We had just eaten a biiiiigggg ice-creammm, but not compared to ice-cream (gelato) in Italy. I tried many types of ice-cream in Antalya, even in Shopping Centers, ice-creams named as gelato but it was not as good as the ones in Italy.
I think when people ask me why do you wanna learn italian, my answer could be 'I CAN DIE FOR THEIR GELATO!' even though i am not a fan of italy, i wanna learn the language!

ciociooooo

H.

Dinner in the balcony

2010-09-23T01:04:00.000+03:00

Hi,

bye
H.

It Sucks and sucks again and again...

2010-09-21T22:24:00.000+03:00

Hi,

Right now, i'm crying. Why? Because i dont wanna leave my home! I dont wanna leave my family here. For two years, each time i came home, i dont wanna leave. You know i dont like Burdur, i dont like the way people live here but, i dont wanna leave my family and start a new life in İstanbul either! I am a studpit, i am a biiig biiig head!!!!
This time i dont wanna go to İstanbul, i dont wanna go any where!
Fuck, i will miss my mum, sister and even though hardly speaks, i will miss my dad!!!
Fuck!
The life is so difficult, especially for me!

Con Gizem

2010-09-21T01:07:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

io e la mia cugina, si chiama Gizem.

ciao

Lunaparkkkk in Antalya

2010-09-21T01:04:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I am contiuning on showing you some frames from Antalya trip. I wish i could show you some from Olympos also, but we couldnt go there:( for a few reasons: money, family, cousins, having fun in antalya, and Fatmagül:P It is so funny because can you beleive i decided not to go there after seeing a turkish tv serie: Fatmagül'ün suçu ne? what was the sin of Fatmagül?

Anyway, during the time we were in Antalya, my aunt and my cousins visited us also, but they stayed in a hotel, not with us, with my other cousins. With them, after beach, we went to their hotel and swam in their pool also, and then we went to Migros, andddd, Lunapaaarrkkk, Entertainment Park.

Here are some photos from that night:

we tried it, with gizem, crazy dance, i loved it!

ooo, zio mio:P

i enjoyed it so mucchhhh

xoxo

On Beachhhhhhhh

2010-09-21T00:41:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I love to be on beach! I was always with my sister! Here are some photos from beach park:

ciaociao

xoxo

H.

First picture from Antalya trip!

2010-09-21T00:10:00.000+03:00

hi,

You know that last week i was in Antalya, finally, i had vacation! It was great! I loved it!
I love my cousins!
Cousins forever.....
This picture was my first, on the way to go to beach park, i was so excited! I admir beach park! Konyaaltı, love you!

ciaooooo
H.

I Love It!

2010-09-12T03:02:00.000+03:00

Hi beautiful people,

I feel great right now, i love it, i love it! I like going on vacation, i even like to prepare for it! This feeling is great! At least for a week, i wont think of anythink but i will just lie on the beach. There will be sth like 'Night life'! After a month spent in Burdur, i only need 'night life'.
Fun, entertanment, wait for me, i am here, just for you!
Eğlendirin beni dostlar:))))
ciao belli!

xoxo

H.

Like a Shit!

2010-09-11T04:21:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I dont know why but, right now, i dont feel myself very well, right nowwww!
Someone in this world start life very luckily. However, i'm not sure whether i am one of them or not!
Life is sometimes beautiful, but sometimes it sucks.
But, actually, i'm doing very well these days. The festival has started. I like it. I will go on holiday the other day, and i'm sure we will enjoy it!
God, all i need is just vacation i guess!
Ohh, forgot! The first thing i need is of course MONEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come on baby, come to me! I will spend you with pleasure.

they will come to me by masses i beleive:)

xoxo
H.

Con Özlem! Bellissima! (due ricciute)

2010-09-09T02:06:00.000+03:00

Basta!
xoxo
H.

La Festa Ramazan

2010-09-09T01:56:00.000+03:00

Ciao genti,

Oggi cominca la festa Ramazan. Sono molto felice perche non ho fatto molto cosi per un mese! Pero adesso, comincano tutti, la festa, la vacanza nostra!...Domani, la mattina, (veramente devo dormire per svegliare presto) io, la mia sorella, il mio padre andriamo a Yakalar e Akçaören, due paesi di Burdur, perche i miei nanni abitano la. E molto diversa tradizione! Mi piace molto. Perche tutti i genti di la mia famiglia, cugini, zio, zia, tutti sarano la, insieme!
Vado via!
Ciaciao....
H.

Now in the memory!

2010-09-07T01:55:00.000+03:00

These remained as good memories; because, my hair got very different, i lost the curls!!!

i didnt know that i liked my hair sooooooooooooooooo much! i couldnt appreciate it!

BASTA!
I will miss you my beautiful,dark, curly hair...
xoxo
H.

Un po diversa!

2010-09-07T01:45:00.000+03:00

İ miei capelli! cosi,...
This is my new hair, however, the colour a bit lighter! Here it is darker!
Even though i am getting used to it, i started not to like it!
Dammit!
Ciao
H.

Perugia

2010-09-06T05:30:00.001+03:00

Hi,

Today I want to present you Perugia, where i spent my last July. Even though i will try my best, i'm sure i wont be able to present it completely, as only one month spent there. However, next year these times, i think i will be able present it throughly. If i dont change my mind, i will spent 5 months in Perugia. I hope it wont be soooooo bad. Actually it is not that bad but compared to İstanbul, it's nothing! For example, i cannot make a generalization but as far as i see, in Italy, the night life is different and for ME, it's boring. It is nothing compared to İstanbul:)

fontana maggiore

Here is the centre of Perugia. During the night, everyone comes here and sits on stairs. It seems cool in the beginning but, i'm not used to such a night life. There are some pubs, but i dont like very much.I miss İstanbul very much there.

-a panaroma from Perugia-

streets are full of these kind of people, singing.

this is a pix from piscina pellini, i love the clouds in italy!

XOXO

My New Hair....

2010-09-02T03:21:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I just want to tell you sth.
I had my hair dyed. I am a little blond now. It feels so weird because even though it has been 4 days, i still couldnt get used to it.
When i'm ready, i will share photos of me. New style.
It took me many years to make a change!
I hope this wont make harm to my hair.
bye
H.

After Athens, one full day spent in İstanbul

2010-08-23T23:46:00.003+03:00

Hi,
This is the story of 10th and 11st of August, my return from Athens. I love my dearest friend so much that i afraid. I dont know why but i afraid so much! It was so difficult to leave George, all of me was telling 'Koni, koni', however, i thought that i should leave, i made my decision on my second day in Athens. My mum kept telling 'come Hilal, come, Ramazan is starting', and i decided to leave that beautiful city after one week i came. Anyway, in my last day, i woke up and i was starving, and i just wanted to eat Mcdonals, i dont know why! Of course my dearest friend took me to Mcdonalds and i ate. I was full. Then we drove to a beautiful cafe, right next to beach, it was great. There we didnt have much time because my flight was at 7 pm. We drank coffe and we played Tavla. Annnddd, i won:)

he went to get the Tavla/i

he signed on my leg:p

koni, amico mio...

I hate the farewells, goodbyes! It was so difficult that i cannot even explain it!

Later, in the plane, even before the plane let me tell you sth. As usual, i was the last passenger for the plane. Again, i couldnt find the gate and went to the other side. I'm telling again because the same thing happened to me while going to Athens also. People were waiting for me on the bus to go next to the plane. OMG.

I got on, and it was beautiful also on plane, the scenery.

I bought a J&B from free shop and went, but i missed the city bus, so i waited a bit for the shuttle. I paid more. I was fucking broke those days. I spent huge amounts in Italy.

Then i went to Lone's place, and we chatted and went out.We returned back to home after 4 in the morning. We just slept. I dont know at what o'clock we got up.The next day::

All the day we hung out aroun İstiklal first, then we went to Kanyon, and met Onur there. While we were leaving i noticed that that meeting was our last meeting. At least for a year. Because Lone was leaving on 28th of August for Danimark, and she will be in New York City next year, spring semester while i am in Perugia, and that night i was leaving for Burdur, and Onur in a month will go to Dubai to work there at least 6 for 6 months. It was sad. We didnt make pictures.I couldnt make pictures because i just wanted to live the moment. Like in Athens. In Athens, most of the time i didnt make photos. Even George was asking why dont you take photos? I didnt know the answer. I just didnt feel to take. I think i was too afraid to take pictures because everything was so great, i just wanted to live the moment. That's why sometimes i dont feel like taking photos.

Later
That night i was leaving for Burdur. It was so sad between me and Lone, my friend. She came with me until i got into the bus. I will miss her. And a very very different life in Burdur was waiting for me...
Kalimera Burdur. ante gamisu Burdur.
Bye
H.

Going to Airport with Lone

2010-08-23T23:44:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I wanna show you some photos from 4th of August, while i was going to Atatürk Airport, to leave for Athens. Lone accompanied me, love you girl. We were in a hurry. That day we went to hairdresser first, then to banks, i got whatever i had from the banks. Then we went to Hisarüstü. I paid Cihan, Kadir paidme etc etc.:)

Then i went to pick up my stuff fromÖmür's house and helped him with his italian project. Lone slept at the house while i was dealing with the project. Later we hurried home and i prepared my stuff. Then we left. We barely cought the bus.

However we had made sth before got into the bus. Here is it:

Yes we did it, we ate that Çiğ Köfte inside the bus:)
It was so funny people were talking to us, making fun of us:)
The woman in front of me said to the man next to her:
'I got hungry'
And then everyone was laughing...

Life is beautiful.
H.

Girlsssss

2010-08-23T05:54:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

Voglio incotrare la mia sorella, si chiama Aylin, la mia cugina, si chiama Gizem, e la mia piccola cugina, Simge. Siamo cugine e a me piaccono loro molto.

Dio mio, ci aiuta! Vorrei una vita molto bella per noi!...

H.

Some Frames Jammed Among Three Beautiful Mediterrenean Countries

2010-08-22T06:38:00.002+03:00

Hi young people and people who feel themselves young;

These pictures were from a time i just arrived from Rome and first without knowing i am going to Athens, and how i spent a few days in İstanbul. These are important for me because they are really products of a jammed period among Italy Turkey and Greece.

Anyway, i just wanna put some photos, taken in a time in between everything.

From Rome to İstanbul...

This plane journey was my second journey. It was my first one to travel by plane at a time when sun rises...

It was a great feeling to be on clouds and be able to see them....

İstanbul, very close to Sabiha Gökçen, which means Pendik...

The balcony of Onur's house, 5 min. far away from the airport, he picked me up, God i have good friends.

We hung out in the house a bit. Then he went to work. I waited him.

OMG, can you beleive what happened? Why does Onur has to carry Kadir? Molto divertente!

In order to explain what happened beriefly; remember i told you Onur broke Kadir's ankle while they were wrestling on the grasses in front of North Dormitory. This picture were right after dinner with a lot of people in the house of Kadir, Kayhan, and Umut. However as the house was incredibly hot and there were nothing to cool it ike a clima, everyone went out directly after eating. Everyone ordered sth and we waited our meals to come, ate quickly, as quickly as possible, and went out. However there was a great problem, how Kadir could go out of the house? He couldnt walk. That was our remedy:)))

Cihannnnn, he cannot just smile when taken his photo, he has to use his arms! It is a must....

We liked that photo, of course this is a made in Cihan Photo. Kayhan didnt like it. You're so different man!

A photo of Onur taken by Cihan, at Börekçi. These are all the day before i left for Atina.

I was talking George on skype about coming to Atina. Made by Cihan Durmaz.

It was such a good night. I really miss my school. I like it very much!

Boğaziçi Forever.

News

2010-08-20T17:39:00.001+03:00

Hi,

I just decided to do sth. I will give good information (i hope so) about the cities i've been. Both from italy and turkey. Anyway, other than these two countries, i've only been in athens:)

I hope that this blog will be more beneficial for others:)

Ciao

H.

Insomnia

2010-08-19T05:11:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I am telling hi to you at time of 5 am in the morning. I didnt sleep yesterday either. However I dont feel any sleepy. I cannot sleep. This is getting more dangerous for me i think. But what can i do i have noooooo idea...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Insomnia

Se non sapete che cosa e significa insomnia, guardi questo link.
Scusami tutti ma per non dimenticare l'italiano, qualche volta devo scrivere qualcosa in italiano. Per favore non essere arrabiata per me!
Mi piace l'italiano!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Voglio dormire ma non posso! Dio mio, aiutarmi!!!

Ciao
Baci
H.

OMG, Girl, Are you sure you are a very very good driver? My first real car accident...

2010-08-19T01:45:00.000+03:00

Hi,

Now i will tell you a story about a girl. She is twenty and has a driving licence only for two years. She studies at another city, and she doesnt have a car there. She can only drive when she visits her family in her hometown. Even though i still hardly beleive that she is a good driver, she cannot find many opportunity to improve her driving.

Anyway, after posting damn things about Burdur, i think God sent me a message: Be careful, be calm Hilal!

Today, i was driving crazily again. In the morning i went to pick my grandparents up, and i tried everything with the car. I love speed. However, if i am not driving i get afraid of speed. Even though i am not perfect, when i am driving i like speed! I am stupid i know but, that is how i think!

In the afternoon, we would leave the house with my cousin, Gizem. However, the car was uprising again. It was like: WHERE IS MY OWNER, I WANT HALİL. I DONT LIKE YOU! YOU'RE CRAZY FUCKING BITCH!

My father was sleeping but after he heard the appeals, he got up and came next to the car. I really dont understand the moment the car saw my father, it stops crying! It is fucking crazy but it's true! He said to me how do you drive Hilal, it's not so good the way i drive. I was getting into the car and yelling:

I AM A GOOD DRIVER DAD, VERY VERY GOOD DRIVER.

After 30 seconds:

I dont remember anything but i just looked at Gizem just for a milisecond, then i saw something green. And then i was on the road again and i stopped!

It took me a while to grasp what has happened! The rear-window mirror, inside of it was on my knees. The outside was lying on the road. I was afraid. Everywhere inside the car there were green things.

I took the piece of mirror and drove. I directly went to my uncle. He made something, he shipped the mirror, and i was still in a bit shock.

I always remembered my words to my mum and dad. My mum always warns me to be slower.

I before harmed the car, the previous car, however, that was my first real car accident. Even though it's so small, i was so afraid. I cannot think what i can do if i hit a wall, girder, or another car, or even a person! Omg, God, please, i will be a good girl from now on, i wont drive very fast. I wont deal with anything while driving. I dont wanna live again this or even worse.

God Bless me!

H.

Burdur

2010-08-18T12:16:00.000+03:00

Hi people,

Now i wanna talk a bit about my fucking hometown. God, i hate here. The people living here are just irrogant! They are fucking mean and irrogant! I hate here. I cannot stand living here more than one month.

I am not a snobbish person but i just pity my years spent here. God, why was i born here and spent here my best years, 18 years????????????????????????????????
Can you beleive, when i wear just a skirt, not even short, like on my knees, it is a problem. It is not a problem for me, i dont care stupit fucking brainless people staring but when it is a problem for my father, mother and grantparents, there is a great problem for me. I wont care anything, however, i cannot beleive how irrogant they can be. Fuck you all people. Go and fuck yourselves! I hate all of you!
Here i am at my home, i should be as relaxed as anywhere. I shouldnt think about anything! However, i cannot find things to put on!
I am so sorry to tell these truths about a small city in Turkey, because normally i was always telling good things about Turkey, i was even advertising it, this time i wont be able to. This is the truth. For tourists there is not a problem. However, if you're from here, there is a problem for you. Actually i am thinking about not coming here for longer periods. I cannot stand. Can you beleive, it is summer and just a few girls are wearing shorts! They have to wear long jeans!
It is bullshit!
Fuck you people!
Fuck you!
I wont care, look at my legs and boobs millions of times, i dont care. Go and fuck yourselves, you poor, disgusting, fucking stupit people!
God, why i dont have a beautiful hometown like everyone, why i dont like Burdur. My friends all like their hometowns.
If these are the traditions of my country, fuck my country also.
No one can tell me sth about what i wear! I dont care people, no one!
I am so precious and i am aware of it!
I pity people living in Burdur. Especially young people. They cannot think very well, their horizon is just too small.
Anyway, i dont give a fuck!
PEOPLE, LEAVE ME ALONE, GO AND FUCK YOURSELVES!

H.

This is for Turkish Peope

2010-08-18T11:31:00.000+03:00

Selam millet,

http://fotogaleri.ntvmsnbc.com/vize-istemeyen-ulkeler.html?position=5

Benim için şu link çok değerli, bir bakın belki sizin de dikkatinizi çeker. Gezmeyi, yeni yerler görmeyi sevenler için. Şu fotoğrafları kendi makinemden çekmek benim için paha biçilmez.

Byeeeee

H.

Ramazan...

2010-08-17T18:21:00.000+03:00

Hi people,

I wanna tell you a little about Ramazan, or Ramadan. These days, i am at my hometown, doing nothing, sleeping too much, fasting. It is a tradition of Islam. I am not religious but i respect Ramazan very much. However, this year it's not like what it should be like. My father is at work, my sister works so with my mum only we eat.
Actually i hope that Ramazan will be more beautiful. I even left my friend in Athens for this. However i regret now. I didnt like it this year very much. I coulndt catch the spirit.

http://www.turkeytravelplanner.com/Religion/ramazan.html
here you can learn more.
ciao
H.

Hard Rock Craziness

2010-08-15T03:53:00.000+03:00

Hi guys,

I wanna tell you about one of my craziness. I am dying for these hard rock cafessssss.....
Until now, i've only been two of them. One of them is in Rome, and the other is in Athens.
I wanna create a mission for myself, and the mission is to go all the cities which have Hard Rock cafes. But there should also be a time limit. Like in the next five years. I have all the adresses.)
I want one in İstanbul!

xoxo
H.

I am so confused! (part 1)

2010-08-15T03:04:00.000+03:00

Hi guys,

   I am so confused for many reasons, i need to write these! There are a lot of things which make me confused! I annot be sure about anything. I cannot understand my own feelings, thoughts, everything related to me!
   Last week, suddenly i decided to go to Greece, 2 days after i came in İstanbul! No one wanted me to go, tehy all said to me it's so weird, you came here only two days ago, where are you going? I didnt have money. I didnt know how much money i owe to the bank, because i spent enourmously in Italy, and i thought i will go directly home! I dont wanna think while spending! Anyway, these money issues are just bullshit! Malakie...

   I talked with my friend, George, He said to me, are you joking, of course you're coming my friend (This is english translation of what he said:) Anyway, i talked with my mum and father, they said nothing but they were so unhappy about it. My mum kept telling about Ramazan, my father was angry with me because i hadnt gone to home since april, he said if you dont want you have the right not to come daughter! Then whatever, i really wanted to go, but i wasnt sure about the visa issue either! I just read something from internet and told my friend i can enter Greece with my visa, and talked about coming or not. I had to decide and let him know about it until 5 pm. I called Onur, I was still in his house because i didnt find Kadir and the other very intimate the other day. Actually, that's another story. I went with all of my luggage, to Hisarüstü, we went of course with Onur. Anyway, the first day of me in İstanbul, i spent at the house of Onur. He went to work, i rested a bit, and waited for him to come. Then we went to airport again because the polieman forgot to put the sign of my entrance in Turkey. We couldnt handle it, later in a hurry, we went to school. And let me tell me sth, the house of Onur is one side, our school is the other side of İstanbul, and if you think a bit how big İstanbul is, you will understand what does it mean! But at least he has a car, and there was no traffic.
We went to school. I was so excited about it! I had missed my school very very much! However something were missing, may be it was because that time was final week! Anyway we went into the building, i mean the dormitory because Kadir had told us that they were there. I was so excited because after ıver a month i would see my friends. We went, i first saw Cihan, he was so sweet, we hugged, and then we entered into eating room, Kadir was also there. I waited him to stand suddenly and hug me but he didnt care much, at least i thought so. We spoke like 2 minutes and then Kadir sat down to continue studying. How? What the fuck? I came here. I would stay at your place today, please care a bit! There i decided to turn back to Onur's place with him. Then we went to eat something because both of us were starving. We went to Hazalana and ate. Cihan and Kadir came later. I was thankful to Cihan as he had an exam the next day. He cared about me and came. I knew it.
Then we went back to north campus. We were chilling out there. İsot came, Tuğçe came, the bitch Ayşegül was close to us sitting with a girl. Whatever. I dont care. The next day i would learn many things from Kadir: Ayşegül and Betül were not talking, Ayşegül and Cihan were not talking, İsot and Cihan were not talking, and a new girl was in our group, named Özlem. Everyone was talking about an Özlem. Who is she? I learned later, i knew her. Whatever. Fuck Ayşegül!
Something really interesting happened that night: while Kadir and Onur were wrestling, Onur broke Kadir's foot:)
We went to hospital because he was even crying. It was overt that it was hurting too much. We couldnt find anyone at medico so we decided to go Balta Limanı Bone Hospital. I have a few photos and a video, while we were at the hospital.

To be continued...

XOXO

H.

Apologize

2010-08-14T01:26:00.001+03:00

Hi everyone,

   Firstly, I wanna apologize because of mt irregular way of using the languages! If I want people to benefit from my blog, I think i should regularize it a bit. Because I noticed that in order to understand my blog, one needs to learn both italian, turkish, and english. As i want more people to benefit (reallly among bullshits, there are something you can benefit very much).

   I decided to do like that: I will write only english, but if i wanna express myself in other languages, i will write them as different posts. Anyway, I will tell you about my trips, my studies, my general life, and point of view. I think i need to apologize also one more, because of my terrible english. I am aware that i've lost my english, but i hope i will do something about it!

OK.
Love you all.

XOXO

H.

Taking the Risk

2010-08-04T03:02:00.000+03:00

Ciao everyone,

Right now, i am at Lone's place, in İstanbul! I came yesterday morning, and Onur picked me up from airport. Everything was great, i saw my friends, Onur helped me all the time, there were problems with the cell phones i bought, because the gate police forgot to put the sigh of enterance to Turkey on my pasaport, etc etc. I couldnt solve the problem yet anyway. But, now, i have even a bigger problem. May be biggest! I am a bit afraid though. I read something on internet and i thought that i can go to Greece with my visa. But now i think so much different, because i afraid i cannot. I really afraid that i will have to return back from Airport. If it happens at here, in Turkey, it will be easier. But if it is in Greece, it will be even worse. I already bought my ticket, i am so afraid, because i would throw my 70 euros, and now i am so much broke. In Italy, i didnt spend like a humanbeing. I am fucking bad at it! I dont know how to not spend! I am spending my money on everything, and i dont even care whether i have the money or not. I just spend it. And with credit card it's easier.
God, help me!
Help me get in Greece without any problems!!! I wanna see my friends.
I just need a little bit luck i think.
Help!
XOXO
H.

Last 2 Days in Italy

2010-07-31T05:55:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

   Non lo so whether devo dire bongiorno oppure buono notte. Perche e 04:46 e non dormo adesso. Oggi, la sera era molto strano per me, e percio voglio recoltarla.
   Mentre parlevo con mio amico Georgo, Aygün ha telefonato. Ho deciso andare a sua casa. Ho pensato che c'e una festa alla sua casa ma la festa non era alla sua casa ma alla casa che sii megliore casa ho visto durante la mia vita. Ma un po strano per me perche non so perche ma ho speso la mia vita a Perugia con i miei amici, e siamo stati come i bambini. Mi piace questo, non lo so perche! Perche mi piacciono loro, non lo so!
   Per oggi, non era come bambini, ho sentito che sono venti e ci sono altri anche piu vecchia di me e loro sono cool, e l'italiani. Ma .......

TO BE CONTINIUED!
ARKASI YARIN!

Ciao
H.

Today is Venerdi, By By George

2010-07-29T18:36:00.001+03:00

Ciao,

Oggi non e bello giorno. Neanche domani. I miei amici che mi piacciono molto tutti ritornano a casa. Sono molto tiriste. Sono qui alle fino Domenica. Avro a Roma Domenica mattina. Non voglio fare niente. Le mie bambine anche partono domani mattina.Anche Vassillis. Oggi, carissimo George e andato. Mi piace lui moltissimo. Come Cihan, Kadir.

miei amici

siamo quatro

non posso dire niente...

Non posso dire piu! Mi piace qui con i miei amici!

XOXO

Ciao

Last 5 Days in Italy

2010-07-27T18:47:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

Today is the 27th of July, and this means i only have 5 more days before i leave for İstanbul. Of course it is not so bad if your destination is İstanbul, as one of my friends just said that Onur came and they're going to Taksim, but it's overt that i dont wanna leave here now. The worse, my friends are leaving before me. I hate staying back. All of my life, i am used to go, leaving people, things back, but i am not used to stay back. I cannot stand watching people going.But life is hard. I know and i have to get used to everything.

A picture from Florance.

Ci vediamo dopo.

XOXO

H.

Cazzo! I got the Scholarship! I dont want to come Perugia Again!

2010-07-20T20:25:00.000+03:00

Ciao Raga,

Fuck, cazzo, shit, merda......

I just learned that i got the scholarship of erasmus, means i have to come Perugia if i want to go Erasmus. I cannot go anywhere other than Perugia! Shittttttttttttttttttttttttttt........................

I am so stupit because i should have cancelled it before i got the scholarship! Now, i have to come here again for 5 months!

I dont know, may be it will be goos! I hope so! God help me! At least i will improve my italian. It's ironic actually because what i had wanted and planned is exactly here. Coming to Perugia before erasmus, improving the language, than coming for erasmus and being fluent in the language. I hope at least at the end of next spring i will be fluent in italian.

God, help me!

When i am here in Perugia, i wanna meet cool people, please help me!

p.s: For my travels and life in Perugia or in Italy, i will tell everything about it, later wait! Perhaps, most probably when i am in Burdur, wait!

Ciao...

XOXO from Italy

H.

I Started to Love Here!

2010-07-13T16:43:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

I am in Perugia today for two week and even though in the beginning it was difficult, now, i like here! I like Italy!

Perugia Jazz Festival is still going on and here a few picture:

i am sorry, the most beautiful ones are in my camera.

when i am bak in Turkey, I will give you very important information about Italy, and of course photos.

Take care.

Ohh Girl, do not Reveal the Devil inside Me!

2010-06-06T20:52:00.000+03:00

Ciao tutti,

Today, I learned something again. You should never ever never give importance to anyone with whom you're unsure whether s/he likes you or not. I mean if you give importance to someone or like his or her as a close friend, be sure that s/he doesnt play behind you or tries to devestate you. And be sure that s/he is not jealous about you. If you have some doubts about anything, dont behave like s/he is your closest friend. Being good friends must bring no doubts. You have to rely on them.

Even if s/he tries to humiliate you, just kick his or her ass.

Thanks to Kadir, my eyes have been opened. You're not nice Ayşegül, just as i am with you! I was as innocent as an angel may be, when i think about us, you and me. But you behaved me just like a fucking devil. Yes. It took me months to understand that. But now, my eyes are wide open. You wont hurt me anymore. I felt that i am such a jerk when you gave the doctrins. But i'm sure, I know myself, I am a nice person but you're not. I also learned that you are causing some of my friends not to like me, have prejeduces about me.

Kadir told me that you're so successfull at your policy, but THIS is the END. Ok?

You wont hurt me any more. But may be i can hurt you. It's up to me!

Btw: You're always telling me sth that you know will hurt me, i am not a bitch, i'm just an innocent girl, but you're not. But girl, i am more attractive than you, please accept this truth! I dont know why as your hair for example more beautiful than mine, you're taller than me, but i dont know why, boys like me, not you, sorry:( May be it's difficult for you to accept this fact as you're telling me boys like you because you seem like not a good girl but i wont believe you any more. I know myself, i know people, and now i know you also.

Bye bye sweety.

XOXO

H.

Be Spontenous!

2010-06-05T04:56:00.000+03:00

Ciao tutti,

Today I learned something; first i can have fun without drinking (even though my friends expect me to drink, i wont, at least for 6 months, if i get used to it, i wont drink any more), life can be weird, unexpected things can happen, but you wont know what one of your friend is thinking about you, you can fail a course just because you havent started to study, and when you think that everything has ended and you're going home, you can come across with new chances in the life, a talk about linguistics, etc. etc.
However guys, life is unexpected. It sometimes sucks but, you should learn how to handle it.

XOXO

H.

IT SUCKS

2010-06-04T01:48:00.001+03:00

Ciao

I have just learned that my friends thought that i am childish. Is it really true? It can be true somehow but as Sabahattin Ali told, they are not trying to understand me. They just think something about me and they do not make any effort to know me understand me or see the world from my eyes. But they may be right about my drinking problem. I hate drinking actually.

Nothing should make me upset but, it sucks...

I think i wont be able to pass one or two of my courses so i wont be able to go to erasmus. I should study, tomorrow i have one final and one make-up.

But life sucks sometimes.

God, arent i as grown up as enough?

Nonsense...

Ciao...

H.

OHH Ragazza, You've done with the Turkish Paper!

2010-05-29T18:48:00.001+03:00

Ciao tutti,

I've just completed one of my papers about a novel named 'Zeliş'. Here is the pic.:

It was about a girl and a boy both loving each other but the girl's father wanted her to marry another man, a rich man. Actually being rich is funny in that book because it was written after the Independence War in Turkey, everyone is so poor that having a territory means that you're rich.

It was a realistic love story but it wasnt a classical romance. As the writer is a realist, in the novel there were a lot of facts about the community, living conditions, traditions, etc.

I wrote a report about both the writer and the work, it was 9 pages. It is over now i am so happy.

But there is another portfolio and report waiting for me to write it. It is from my Community Service class and i will report what i did during the semester. Of course i will talk about Conversation Club. Even though i didnt like it very much, it was a good experience for me. At least i made something for the community.

Now i will go to Uçaksavar Stadium to run. My new hobby.

XOXO.

H.

This is for you guys! The ones who hurt me most!

2010-05-29T14:09:00.001+03:00

Hi,

Lamia, you told me you're following my blog, and this is for you also sweety.

Know this:

I WON'T FORGIVE YOU HONEY!

Even after yesterday night you didnt change your mind. I cant tell you do not do it, but you shouldnt have done this.

I WONT FORGIVE YOU!

Except my dear Merve,

FUCK YOU ALL GIRLS!

GO HELL!

I DIDNT DESERVE IT BUT YOU DO!

LAMİA YOU STILL HAD THE CHANCE BUT I WONT FORGIVE YOU! YOU CANNOT EXPECT ME TO FORGIVE YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU KNOW HOW BAD I FELT, WHAT I THOUGHT, DESPITE ALL YOU'RE STILL WITH THE MOTHERFUCKERS! IT WAS YOUR DECISION! YOU CHOSE ME INSTEAD OF THEM. SO FAREWELL DEAR, EVEN THOUGH I STILL LOVE ALL OF YOU, FAREWELL TO ALL! DESPITE EVERYTHING I DID, THEY WERE SO INDISPENSIBLE!

Benim canımı bu kadar yakanlar;

Kendi pisliğinizde boğulun!

Lamia, i wasnt expect you to do this to me.

I HATE YOU ALL!

You told me yesterday, i would just get shattered if you had done this to me! Is it so unimportant for you? My getting shattered and broken!

I didnt deserve it!

You little motherfucker son of a bitch! I hate you most! It is not you Lamia.

ÇIKIN HAYATIMDAN BİR AN ÖNCE!

YOLUMDAN ÇEKİLİN!

GO TO HELL!

Ps: Remember me if you're left somewhere in your lives ok?

Bu kadar dağıldığımı göre göre hala bunu bana nasıl yaparsın Lamia? Nasıl bir vicdanın var? Helal olsun diyorum gerçekten. Nefret ettiğim bir adamı bile o halde görsem vazgeçerdim, ama sen helal olsun kararında o kadar ısrarcıymışsın ki, vazgeçmedin be HELAL OLSUN!

GOD HELP ME!

Tebrikler ama hepinize gerçekten, canımı yakamadınız diyemeyeceğim çünkü bunu yaptınız. Bu dünyada kimse benim canımı yakamazdı ama siz bunu bi şekilde başardınız. Helal OLSUN! Hepinizi Tebrik Ediyorum!

Beni paramparça ettiniz tebrikler.

XOXO
H.

My ex Room mates are Looking for a New Mate, How Humiliating!

2010-05-28T19:18:00.000+03:00

Ciao tutti,
I wont be able to explain the situation in Italian so i will try to do it in English. I have been staying with the same four people in a small room for a year. One of them is particularly my best friend. Or i thought so. For the other three, one of them is in my department but one year lower. The other two are from engineering departments and especially one is very precious for me. The last one is a bit different, she's 180cm (quite taller than the Turkish -female- avarage) this is out of topic but, we had discussed for a stupit thing just for one. And then i was angry with her just for a week. Then we started to talk again. This was over. Or i thought so.
Actually i was disapointed so deeply and i was so unhappy i think just because i still like them. I really love them but they are doing this to me. I learned that they dont wanna stay with me next year 3 days before. I was destroyed when i first heard it, especially from Lamia. I really beleived that she wouldnt leave me alone. If there is a problem, i thought that she would always with me. But she just told me 'Binnur thinks that you are not matching, characterically, so i will live with them'
I didnt beleive my ears. I was just destroyed. Humanbeings can be the most disgusting bitches sometimes. I would never do this to you Lamia, Binnur, Merve. For the little Merve, she didnt want me either and it shocked me one more time. Not only Binnur but also Merve didnt want me, can you beleive it?
I would never utter this to her but, i helped her with everything. Not only with courses, homeworks, scholarships, etc, etc, i helped her with everything. People should think a bit.
Lamia destroyed me.
Girls, have the honour that you destroyed me. I was the happiest creature in the world, did you do this to me just to destroy it?
I am always asking myself what i did to these girls that they do not want me, and they are even looking for other people to live with! If i did something wrong, they should have told me my faults. They shouldnt have done this to me. It means me a lot. God help me!
What did i do to deserve it? Having fun and living like a teenager shouldnt cost such things in a 20-year-old girls life!

Be careful people, do not rely on anyone. The ones you think closest can hurt you most.

H.

HEY Ragazza! Perche Italiano?

2010-05-28T01:21:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

I will briefly explain why i have been writing italian in my blog. I should improve my italian and it is necessary for me. I spent my whole year trying to do it. Please understand me. I am not so improved in italian so i should try.

A presto.
Kisses.

H.

I Flauti

2010-05-28T01:18:00.000+03:00

Ciao,

Soltanto guarda:

Bouna sera.

H.

At the Helicopter Field

2010-05-28T01:14:00.001+03:00

Ciao tutti genti,
Quando io e i miei amici sono stati a Gaziantep, a Birecik Diga.

A presto.
H.

LONELY GIRL

2010-05-26T02:17:00.000+03:00

Ciao a tutti gente,
Sono sola, molto sola. Non potete immaginare quanto io sono sola.
Mi sento sola...
Nessuno mi ama...
Tutti mi odia,
Ma perche?
Quello che sto facendo per le persone?
Perche queste mi succede?
Sono una persona cattiva? o sono una cattiva ragazza?
Non voglio vivere cosi...
Non voglio...
Non merito queste...

I Miss the Food in Antep!

2010-05-17T01:34:00.000+03:00

Hi people,

I just came from a costume party and it was just awesome! I really liked it. I had and have a wonderful mask, AWESOME!

But as i dont have any photos from it now, as Jessica has the photos, i will let you see some more photos from Antep trip, in the best restaurant in Antep, İmam Çağdaş, it is famous and it is also historical.

We got of the bus right in front of this beautiful restaurant and got served food directly. First we ate Lahmacun but it was the best thing i have ever seen, i mean i decided that in İstanbul the thing they serves us as Lahmacun is just an imitation of it. We first ate it, as a starter.

We drank or ate the ayran from those weird plates and spoons:)

I loved it!

Actually i confess that i asked Cihan how to drink the ayran because first i thought that with those spoons we will fill the bottles with ayran:)

Of course he said no, you will drink from it.

Anyway, after the Lahmacun the main course came, it is the best food ever ever ever ever! I bet about it, PATLICAN KEBABI! I had never eaten such a delicious food before!

God, I wanna eat it right now!

And, do you think we were already full? Kinda:) But never without dessert! Guess what was it? BAKLAVA!

Antep is famous for its baklava, so when you have been to Antep or İmam Çağdaş, you shouldnt leave without eating baklava! Do i need to describe how delicious was it?

And, for İmam Çağdaş it was the end. But for the trip:

to be continiue...

XOXO

Just Took My Attention

2010-05-16T02:51:00.000+03:00

Ciao everyone,
I feel really cool today as there was Şebnem Ferah's concert today and we tried to enter without paying for it but we couldnt it was sooooo funny, we walked from forest and came right to the security guards.
I just wanna share an advertisement which got my attention when i was returning from Etiler. I found it funny!

Do you agree with it?
XOXO
H.

The EUPHRATES

2010-05-15T04:23:00.001+03:00

Ciao people,
I just came from taksim, hmmm, may be i shouldnt talk about it, lets assume that i was at the room all night. Anyway, i wanna share something with you about Euphrates. This river is somehow special as it has a dead life under it. I mean, my friend Cihan told me that while we were on a boat trip on Euphrates, before

Birecik Dam was started to be built, the river wasnt such wide and there were villages and of course a lot of people living along the river. After the decision to make the dam by goverment, people were asked to leave their houses and villages in exchange of money. Because after they started to the construction the water would be higher and everywhere will be under water. As natural, the villagers didnt want to their hometowns and houses. And the goverment had to do one thing in order to make them leave: One day, like 5 am, they open the doors of the dam, letting the water going away. The villages were under water and people had no other choice but leave the villages. I dont blame anyone here, because these dams earn a lot in Turkey. If they are ran by Turkish companies of course.

I found it so much interesting that, it was unbelievable that we were going below real villages and everything by the boat. Cihan said to me that after that day, everyone was picking the fruits from trees by a float. Even when they were swimming in the river (even though it is too dangerous) they holded a tree branch or they came across a house top, and they sat and let their legs down, or they were standing on them and when you took its picture, it seemed like you're standing on water.

I really like the river. Its colour is really different, close to green. Cihan told me that some people are still living in the tops of the rocks as down are filled with water. Sometimes the water even comes to their houses and destroys them closely.
But people still dont wanna go anywhere from there. They really like there. Even Cihan was in a different mood and he said that he really missed here.
The Euphrates was located between Gaziantep and Şanlıurfa.

Other than these specialities, actually we first saw its gyres while crossing the Birecik Bridge. Here is a picture of it even though i am not sure whether they can be seen from the picture or not but they were amazing and terrifying.

I really like the Euphrates and it deserves to be seen. It is just awesome.
H.

The Daughter of Nemrud:)

2010-05-14T16:50:00.001+03:00

Hello people,
I wanted to share everything about our trip to Antep and Urfa with you but the life is going on, so as i am Hilal, i can do many things other than living in the same pace. I mean i am doing many things which will destroy everything.
I am , sometimes i am angry with myself, even though i'm in love with myself:) that is why i dont like any one other than me. especially boys, i mostly hate you!
anyway, nice memories from Urfa and Antep.

LELELELELELELE

2010-05-10T01:51:00.001+03:00

Still the beginning...

Cihan the great:

İzlem

Very Very First Pic. from the Trip

2010-05-10T01:39:00.000+03:00

Hello everyone,
From now on, you will see some great (according to me) photos and evetns from Gaziantep, Şanlıurfa and on the way to Antep from İstanbul. I will try to explain how wonderful were the places there.
This is the first picture from my camera.

I dont know how to explain this great journey! It was just WONDERFUL!
The first happening on the way to Antep was 'Ben erkek yanına oturmam' and '51, 52', the bus driver and the boys in the front were fighting and i thought that we would die because the driver was sleeping or something. But the problem was (we learned it later) that one of the boys said to the driver stop somewhere and i will pray, and he answered no, and swear sth, and like 5 am in the morning while we were sleeping we woke up and i was so frightened.
Anyway, i wanna talk about the whole journey but i am sick (after 30+ hours journey) and i have midterms and courses tomorrow. So i have to sleep i guess.
And the last word from our great trip was WONDERFUL!
H.

A Wonderful Family!

2010-05-04T00:22:00.000+03:00

Hi,

I wanna show you a photo from very very very very old times, but it is perfect in my opinion.

I wish the quality of the photo is better but, even though it is not good quality, i just admire that photo. God, please dont take those people before me! How wonderful family they are! From the left my mum (the most loved person in the world by me), my grandmother, my aunt (i appreciate having such an aunt), my grandfather, and my uncle (he's one of the funiest creatures in the world), and in the middle, my mum told me that he's a part of their family too. But i dont know his name. Isnt it just wonderful to have such a family picture? Everybody has changed now. I also like them when they are like in that photo.

H.

Who are they?

2010-05-04T00:16:00.000+03:00

Hi,

Is there anyone who remembers or knows that girl? The boy is pretty handsome! I even have their pictures in the same ages while kissing each other. They are sooooo cuteee. The boy is one year older than her. But she has been always superior to him. She' s more brave more man then him. He's a bit coward. But he is also one of the best people ever lived. Very very very old times....

Good night.

H.

Hilal and her friends are going to Antep and Urfa

2010-05-03T23:42:00.000+03:00

Ciao,
Yes, it's true, Hilal finally goes to the south-east. Antep and Urfa wonderful! Thanks to Cihan. Love you dear. I hope that this trip would be perfect. I dont know how many people are coming with us. But the only people who are from our group are at least 10 people. It would be LEGENDARY or AWESOME!

May be later i can go to Antakya, Adana, Diyarbakır, Mardin, and finalllllyyyy Syria......

I am planning to travel in June to the Black Sea. I wanna start from İzmit, until Artvin, and theeennn, Gorgiaaaaa....

I wanna go to Italy also but in July. God help me, how can i afford all these travel! Send me money from the sky! Or, help me with everything!

I just wanna take my bakbag and go!

XOXO

H.